Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "How To Deal With Bullies": After attending the meeting the other night I walked away with a number of clearly defined thoughts about the problem.
Simply stated:
Bullying has been around forever.
The parent's view is that school personnel bury their heads in the sand and the bullying is allowed to continue.
The emotional impact is extreme to both the parents and the victims. Not even addressing the possibility of injury or death. The only solution thus far is for the victim to leave the school further traumatizing the victim. NOT ONE PERSON INDICATED THAT BULLING WAS HANDLED TO THEIR SATISFACTION.
Views of the parents and professionals regarding the bullies range from the desire for extreme punishment to a need to help the bullies who may too be victims.
The parents have had enough and want action NOW to help their kids and set policy to minimize the bullying issues in the future. There have been comments questioning the right of this group to band together regarding a problem. It seems to me that that right was not only protected by the constitution but encouraged by the constitution. When something is wrong in our society it is not only a right to band together for change but a duty that has been long ignored by our apathetic majority. The parents have stood by and accepted the lack of action by the schools for far too long. The principals, teachers, board, PTA etc have known about this problem and have done nothing. Now that the issue has been raised we are suddenly hearing that all of the people and organizations in "power" have put this on their agenda a few months before this group united. Yeah right! They have worked very hard for a long time in their efforts to accomplish nothing. Since no one else has done anything perhaps it is time for this group to step up, grow larger and force action. Clearly that action has to be a combination of changing the climate on a consistent ongoing basis starting at a young age, training for teachers and other professionals, counseling for the victim and the bully, punishment in varying degrees and in the extreme case removal of a child who is a sociopath. Some firm policy has to determined.
I realize that coming up with the ideal solution is just a dream but surely in a matter of months a basic plan should be formulated using the combination of ideas of this committee outside "experts" and the school personnel. Of course this will always be a work in process and we will not see the true results until today's kindergartners reach middle or high school, however today's victims need help NOW.
I wish this committee luck and I hope they can institute action NOW.
Friday, October 1, 2010
To All Parents on the Soccer/Basketball/Lacrosse/Football Field...
Things to think about for "Socce", Parents
· Be your child's best fan and support him unconditionally. He really does want/need your support.
· When you take your child home after a match or training session, please try to be supportive and always focus on the positive aspects of his game, don’t criticize him our his teammates.
·Develop a responsibility in your child to pack his own bag, clean his cleats and take a drink bottle to practice and games.
· Do not criticize the coach to your child or other parents. If you are not happy with the coaches you should raise the issue directly with them away from the field.
· Encourage your son to speak with the coaches. If your child is having difficulties in training or games, or can’t attend training etc. encourage him to speak directly to the coaches. This “responsibility taking” is a big part of becoming a mature person. By handling off the field tasks, your child is claiming ownership of all aspects of the game.
· Help your child to focus on the performance and not the result.
Remember - winning is not as important as the performance.
· Support all the players on our squad. Please do not criticize anyone.
Remember – children don’t mean to make mistakes. They want to succeed.
· Do not criticize our opponents, their parents or the officials.
· Never audibly dispute a referee’s decision. Referees make mistakes, some more than others. We all do. If you abuse or shout at the referee you are breaking the conduct code of the POB Soccer Club and risk generating a LIJSL fine for our team. In extreme circumstances, you could even be asked to leave the sidelines or our team will forfeit the match. You don’t want to escalate anything to that level.
· Parents should not coach from the sideline during our matches. Leave this to the coaches or you may cause confusion and erode your son’s confidence. Don’t make your son choose between listening to his coach’s instructions or disappointing you. Encourage them to play hard but don’t offer specific soccer instructions.
· Please remember – the game is for the children. It is not for the glory of the coaches or parents.
From the US Youth Soccer Website: TRUTHS about children and sports
· Fun is pivotal - if it's not fun, young people won't play a sport
· Skill development is a crucial aspect of fun - it is more important than winning even among the best athletes
· The most rewarding challenges of sports are those that lead to self-knowledge
· Intrinsic rewards (self-knowledge that grows out of self-competition) are more important in creating lifetime athletes than extrinsic rewards are (victory or attention from others)
SOME INTERESTING SOCCER QUOTES:
****************************************************
''Worrying too much about winning and losing gets in the way of development,'' says Manfred Schellscheidt, head of US Soccer's U14 program. ''There are always shortcuts that you can find to win the next game. That doesn't necessarily mean you'll be winning five, six seasons from now... We should be concerned about the players' performance, not the final score.''
*************************************************************************
Tony Carr, Head Coach -West Ham United
Up to the age of 13, is another crucial period. Throughout this time the emphasis should
be placed on having fun and enjoy playing. Too much emphasis is placed on winning at
all costs. I cannot emphasize enough the importance of practice. Improvement in skill does not
just happen overnight, and is unlikely to emerge just by playing in actual games.
*****************************************************************Fabio Capello who was in charge of Milan’s youth set-up for six years says the following:
“You should be focusing on two things: having fun and improving your technique. The other aspects can come later. What’s the point of cluttering his mind with tactical notions and formations? All you’re doing is stifling his ability to express himself.”
“Winning” too often is given top priority in our systems. Players are not seen as a “final product” traveling down a path of development, but instead what they can contribute now, to my team. A sad statement when you are talking about 9 – 13 year olds.
What should be our focus:
We must help players grow and provide a path that leads to improvement, creativity and learning.
The tool bag is portable…
Make sure you don’t focus on the “here and now”. Don’t worry about results but rather the strengths and weaknesses. The “tool bag” of raw technical skills can be taken anywhere the child goes. Keep filling the bag, enjoy the game and let time take its natural course.
*****************************************************************
Too often in America, a professional sport model is used in measuring youth sports success. Youth soccer is not immune to this misapplied standard. For soccer the situation is made worse by a desire of many adults to use measuring tools from other sports. In fact, it is maddening to many adults that soccer is not as black and white as with some sports in judging successful play. Many team sports played in our nation are statistically driven and coach centered.
Soccer is neither of those!
Truths & Motives for Participation
1. Have fun and to enjoy participating in sport.
2. Learn new skills and to improve on existing sports skills.
3. Become physically fit and to enjoy good health
4. Enjoy the challenge and excitement of sports participation and competition.
5. Enjoy a team atmosphere and to be with friends.
Suggestions for Parents
· Remember the truths and talk to your children with them in mind. After a game, ask questions about fun, skill improvement, learning experiences and having a good time with friends.
· See yourself as part of the team and supportive of the coach; avoid setting up a conflict in your child's mind between his or her parents and coaches. If you want to affect the coaching, volunteer to help.
· Develop perspective: remember what you could do at your children's ages; don't judge them by what you can do now. Kids will not become great players overnight.
· Develop an understanding of what your children want from sports—not all children want the same things. Determine if they want to be involved at all. ************************************************************
"The parents are the ones clamoring the loudest for wins, because they associate development with wins. If I teach kids new ball skills, and tell them to experiment with new ball skills during games, they’re going to make a mistake, lose the ball, and give up a goal,” says Sam Snow, the coaching director for US Youth Soccer. Many volunteer coaches have familiarity with football, baseball, and basketball, where coaches engineer team plays and manage discrete situations with the aid of timeouts and regular stoppages in play. In soccer, they are drawn to risk-averse, team-minded tactics that deliver a shortcut to wins, keeping parents happy without necessarily helping players’ long-term growth.
This is from a Sasha Issenberg former director of USA Youth Soccer, in an article for the Boston Globe.
************************************************
Sportsmanship is the ability to:
win without gloating
lose without complaining
treat your opponent with respect.
Treat everyone with RESPECT
Sportsmanship Tips
If you make a mistake, don't pout or make excuses. Learn from it, and be ready to continue to play.
If a teammate makes a mistake, offer encouragement, not criticism.
If you win, don't rub it in.
If you lose, don't make excuses.- it's okay
--
· Be your child's best fan and support him unconditionally. He really does want/need your support.
· When you take your child home after a match or training session, please try to be supportive and always focus on the positive aspects of his game, don’t criticize him our his teammates.
·Develop a responsibility in your child to pack his own bag, clean his cleats and take a drink bottle to practice and games.
· Do not criticize the coach to your child or other parents. If you are not happy with the coaches you should raise the issue directly with them away from the field.
· Encourage your son to speak with the coaches. If your child is having difficulties in training or games, or can’t attend training etc. encourage him to speak directly to the coaches. This “responsibility taking” is a big part of becoming a mature person. By handling off the field tasks, your child is claiming ownership of all aspects of the game.
· Help your child to focus on the performance and not the result.
Remember - winning is not as important as the performance.
· Support all the players on our squad. Please do not criticize anyone.
Remember – children don’t mean to make mistakes. They want to succeed.
· Do not criticize our opponents, their parents or the officials.
· Never audibly dispute a referee’s decision. Referees make mistakes, some more than others. We all do. If you abuse or shout at the referee you are breaking the conduct code of the POB Soccer Club and risk generating a LIJSL fine for our team. In extreme circumstances, you could even be asked to leave the sidelines or our team will forfeit the match. You don’t want to escalate anything to that level.
· Parents should not coach from the sideline during our matches. Leave this to the coaches or you may cause confusion and erode your son’s confidence. Don’t make your son choose between listening to his coach’s instructions or disappointing you. Encourage them to play hard but don’t offer specific soccer instructions.
· Please remember – the game is for the children. It is not for the glory of the coaches or parents.
From the US Youth Soccer Website: TRUTHS about children and sports
· Fun is pivotal - if it's not fun, young people won't play a sport
· Skill development is a crucial aspect of fun - it is more important than winning even among the best athletes
· The most rewarding challenges of sports are those that lead to self-knowledge
· Intrinsic rewards (self-knowledge that grows out of self-competition) are more important in creating lifetime athletes than extrinsic rewards are (victory or attention from others)
SOME INTERESTING SOCCER QUOTES:
****************************************************
''Worrying too much about winning and losing gets in the way of development,'' says Manfred Schellscheidt, head of US Soccer's U14 program. ''There are always shortcuts that you can find to win the next game. That doesn't necessarily mean you'll be winning five, six seasons from now... We should be concerned about the players' performance, not the final score.''
*************************************************************************
Tony Carr, Head Coach -West Ham United
Up to the age of 13, is another crucial period. Throughout this time the emphasis should
be placed on having fun and enjoy playing. Too much emphasis is placed on winning at
all costs. I cannot emphasize enough the importance of practice. Improvement in skill does not
just happen overnight, and is unlikely to emerge just by playing in actual games.
*****************************************************************Fabio Capello who was in charge of Milan’s youth set-up for six years says the following:
“You should be focusing on two things: having fun and improving your technique. The other aspects can come later. What’s the point of cluttering his mind with tactical notions and formations? All you’re doing is stifling his ability to express himself.”
“Winning” too often is given top priority in our systems. Players are not seen as a “final product” traveling down a path of development, but instead what they can contribute now, to my team. A sad statement when you are talking about 9 – 13 year olds.
What should be our focus:
We must help players grow and provide a path that leads to improvement, creativity and learning.
The tool bag is portable…
Make sure you don’t focus on the “here and now”. Don’t worry about results but rather the strengths and weaknesses. The “tool bag” of raw technical skills can be taken anywhere the child goes. Keep filling the bag, enjoy the game and let time take its natural course.
*****************************************************************
Too often in America, a professional sport model is used in measuring youth sports success. Youth soccer is not immune to this misapplied standard. For soccer the situation is made worse by a desire of many adults to use measuring tools from other sports. In fact, it is maddening to many adults that soccer is not as black and white as with some sports in judging successful play. Many team sports played in our nation are statistically driven and coach centered.
Soccer is neither of those!
Truths & Motives for Participation
1. Have fun and to enjoy participating in sport.
2. Learn new skills and to improve on existing sports skills.
3. Become physically fit and to enjoy good health
4. Enjoy the challenge and excitement of sports participation and competition.
5. Enjoy a team atmosphere and to be with friends.
Suggestions for Parents
· Remember the truths and talk to your children with them in mind. After a game, ask questions about fun, skill improvement, learning experiences and having a good time with friends.
· See yourself as part of the team and supportive of the coach; avoid setting up a conflict in your child's mind between his or her parents and coaches. If you want to affect the coaching, volunteer to help.
· Develop perspective: remember what you could do at your children's ages; don't judge them by what you can do now. Kids will not become great players overnight.
· Develop an understanding of what your children want from sports—not all children want the same things. Determine if they want to be involved at all. ************************************************************
"The parents are the ones clamoring the loudest for wins, because they associate development with wins. If I teach kids new ball skills, and tell them to experiment with new ball skills during games, they’re going to make a mistake, lose the ball, and give up a goal,” says Sam Snow, the coaching director for US Youth Soccer. Many volunteer coaches have familiarity with football, baseball, and basketball, where coaches engineer team plays and manage discrete situations with the aid of timeouts and regular stoppages in play. In soccer, they are drawn to risk-averse, team-minded tactics that deliver a shortcut to wins, keeping parents happy without necessarily helping players’ long-term growth.
This is from a Sasha Issenberg former director of USA Youth Soccer, in an article for the Boston Globe.
************************************************
Sportsmanship is the ability to:
win without gloating
lose without complaining
treat your opponent with respect.
Treat everyone with RESPECT
Sportsmanship Tips
If you make a mistake, don't pout or make excuses. Learn from it, and be ready to continue to play.
If a teammate makes a mistake, offer encouragement, not criticism.
If you win, don't rub it in.
If you lose, don't make excuses.- it's okay
--
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Where Was the PTA?
Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "How To Deal With Bullies":
The PTA is terrific at fund raising and at enhancing the school experience, but a change agent? Not a chance.
PTA has demonstrated that they will not aggressively take on challenging topics. If the math issue was left to the PTA, we'd still be waiting. I do not feel represented by the PTA. I cringe when I hear "parent input" at a BOE meeting because it usually means "let's go ask the PTA." Sure there are some ex-PTA leaders on the BOE, but you'll find a couple of members that were elected in large part because they ignored the PTA and actually affected change.
Grassroots coalitions drive change. Passionate people can get things done. This PTA nonsense of declaring they are the only show in town is ludicrous and counter productive. If you want something to change, get involved without worrying which hat participants wear.
The PTA is terrific at fund raising and at enhancing the school experience, but a change agent? Not a chance.
PTA has demonstrated that they will not aggressively take on challenging topics. If the math issue was left to the PTA, we'd still be waiting. I do not feel represented by the PTA. I cringe when I hear "parent input" at a BOE meeting because it usually means "let's go ask the PTA." Sure there are some ex-PTA leaders on the BOE, but you'll find a couple of members that were elected in large part because they ignored the PTA and actually affected change.
Grassroots coalitions drive change. Passionate people can get things done. This PTA nonsense of declaring they are the only show in town is ludicrous and counter productive. If you want something to change, get involved without worrying which hat participants wear.
Teacher to Student Bullying
Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "How To Deal With Bullies":
The full article can be found at
http://searchwarp.com/swa333432-P2.htm
by Rev. Carla Goddard
Everyone is aware of peer on peer bullying and the Education system is emphatic about about not allowing the situation to arise and if it does how to protect the student who is being bullied. What about when teachers bully students. This receives virtually no attention. With the publicity surrounding peer to peer bullying, why is the idea of teacher to student bullying largely ignored in the education system today unless it involves sexual conduct? Is other types of bullying unplausible? Is there a definition for teacher bullying? Does it exist?
Bullying by a teacher is defined as a pattern of conduct, rooted in a power differential, that threatens, harms, humiliates, induces fear, or causes a student substantial emotional distress. What does that really mean? Abuse of power that tends to be chronic and often expressed in public, a form of humiliation that generates attention while degrading the student in front of others, students capabilities are debased and identity is ridiculed. In nearly every case of teacher bullying it is a singular target that this bullied repeatedly. Equally significant is that the teacher usually receives no retribution or other negative consequences.
Victims are chosen on the basis of either vulnerability or because of some devalued personal attribute the teacher perceives of the student. Once targeted, the victim is treated in a manner which will set the student apart from their peers. The teacher makes frequent references to how the student differs from other students whom the teacher perceives as more capable or valuable. As a consequence, the student because a scapegoat among peers.
Teachers who do bully feel their abusive conduct is justified and claim provation by the student. They disguise their behavior as an appropriate part of the instruction, as well as disguising abuse as an appropriate disciplinary response to unacceptable behavior by the student. However, the student is subjected to deliberate humiliation by the teacher that can never ever serve as a legitimate educational purpose.
The full article can be found at
http://searchwarp.com/swa333432-P2.htm
by Rev. Carla Goddard
Everyone is aware of peer on peer bullying and the Education system is emphatic about about not allowing the situation to arise and if it does how to protect the student who is being bullied. What about when teachers bully students. This receives virtually no attention. With the publicity surrounding peer to peer bullying, why is the idea of teacher to student bullying largely ignored in the education system today unless it involves sexual conduct? Is other types of bullying unplausible? Is there a definition for teacher bullying? Does it exist?
Bullying by a teacher is defined as a pattern of conduct, rooted in a power differential, that threatens, harms, humiliates, induces fear, or causes a student substantial emotional distress. What does that really mean? Abuse of power that tends to be chronic and often expressed in public, a form of humiliation that generates attention while degrading the student in front of others, students capabilities are debased and identity is ridiculed. In nearly every case of teacher bullying it is a singular target that this bullied repeatedly. Equally significant is that the teacher usually receives no retribution or other negative consequences.
Victims are chosen on the basis of either vulnerability or because of some devalued personal attribute the teacher perceives of the student. Once targeted, the victim is treated in a manner which will set the student apart from their peers. The teacher makes frequent references to how the student differs from other students whom the teacher perceives as more capable or valuable. As a consequence, the student because a scapegoat among peers.
Teachers who do bully feel their abusive conduct is justified and claim provation by the student. They disguise their behavior as an appropriate part of the instruction, as well as disguising abuse as an appropriate disciplinary response to unacceptable behavior by the student. However, the student is subjected to deliberate humiliation by the teacher that can never ever serve as a legitimate educational purpose.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
How To Deal With Bullies
Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Parents: Speak Up to the Administration and Becom...":
I atteneded the bullying meeting last night and heard some very disturbing stories. A presentation followed on the district is working on changing the climate of school, etc. What boggles my mind is the best solution of all is sooo very avail, and guess what folks its free. It won't cost the schools a dime. You don not have to hire new staff and new laws will not have to be passed. The solution is called .."Having the bully get in deep trouble". There, it is that simple. If these kids (no matter how old they are) know that there are severe repercussions, they will stop. Its that simple. Why are we going around in circles trying to stop this disturbing trend, when all you need is a straight line? Please, someone tell me why the school is so afraid to reprimand a bully?
I atteneded the bullying meeting last night and heard some very disturbing stories. A presentation followed on the district is working on changing the climate of school, etc. What boggles my mind is the best solution of all is sooo very avail, and guess what folks its free. It won't cost the schools a dime. You don not have to hire new staff and new laws will not have to be passed. The solution is called .."Having the bully get in deep trouble". There, it is that simple. If these kids (no matter how old they are) know that there are severe repercussions, they will stop. Its that simple. Why are we going around in circles trying to stop this disturbing trend, when all you need is a straight line? Please, someone tell me why the school is so afraid to reprimand a bully?
No Power- School As Usual?
Is anyone else concerned that Mattlin MS and Central Admin have been without power for almost 2 full days. School has remained in session. Are there appropriate safety measures in place. Are fire alarms working? What about if there needed to be a PA announcement of an emergency? Teachers calling office or nurse? Parent trying to reach school. I didn't get emergency backup numbers...did anyone else? What is cause of failure? POB? LIPA? Is this not a PRIORITY one for whomever to fix?
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Tenure Changes in NYC
Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Taxes to Go UP Another 5%?":
NEW YORK CITY IS MAKING IT HARDER FOR PUBLIC SCHOOL TEACHERS TO GET TENURE, requiring their students to show progress in consecutive years before instructors gain the coveted job protection.
Traditionally, in New York City as in other places, tenure is granted to teachers three years and a day after they begin working. Critics have complained that the protections that tenure accords ineffective teachers makes them hard to remove. Before a teacher reaches tenure, principals can more easily fire them—but they rarely do.
Five years ago, fewer than 1% of New York City teachers were denied tenure. But last year, 11% of teachers were denied tenure or continued on probation, amid a push by schools Chancellor Joel Klein for greater teacher accountability.
Monday's announcement, which was made by Mayor Michael Bloomberg at a New York education conference, goes a step further—by creating new rules for when principals can grant teachers tenure, rather than leaving it up to their subjective judgment or inaction.
Starting with the 6,300 teachers who are up for tenure this year, the city Department of Education will implement a four-point grading system similar to the one passed by the state Legislature earlier this year: highly effective, effective, developing, and ineffective. Under the new rules, principals can only grant tenure if a teacher shows progress with students for two years in a row.
Teachers who are rated "developing" will get a chance to earn tenure after a year of professional development and support, and "ineffective" teachers will not be granted tenure and the chancellor will recommend that they be dismissed.
The teacher's union president, Michael Mulgrew, shrugged off the plans.
"There's less in the mayor's proposals than meets the eye," said the head of the United Federation of Teachers in a statement. "Right now a principal can deny tenure to a teacher for any reason. Most teachers would welcome an objective tenure-granting process based on agreed-upon standards."
Copyright 2009 Dow Jones & Company, Inc. All Rights Reserved
NEW YORK CITY IS MAKING IT HARDER FOR PUBLIC SCHOOL TEACHERS TO GET TENURE, requiring their students to show progress in consecutive years before instructors gain the coveted job protection.
Traditionally, in New York City as in other places, tenure is granted to teachers three years and a day after they begin working. Critics have complained that the protections that tenure accords ineffective teachers makes them hard to remove. Before a teacher reaches tenure, principals can more easily fire them—but they rarely do.
Five years ago, fewer than 1% of New York City teachers were denied tenure. But last year, 11% of teachers were denied tenure or continued on probation, amid a push by schools Chancellor Joel Klein for greater teacher accountability.
Monday's announcement, which was made by Mayor Michael Bloomberg at a New York education conference, goes a step further—by creating new rules for when principals can grant teachers tenure, rather than leaving it up to their subjective judgment or inaction.
Starting with the 6,300 teachers who are up for tenure this year, the city Department of Education will implement a four-point grading system similar to the one passed by the state Legislature earlier this year: highly effective, effective, developing, and ineffective. Under the new rules, principals can only grant tenure if a teacher shows progress with students for two years in a row.
Teachers who are rated "developing" will get a chance to earn tenure after a year of professional development and support, and "ineffective" teachers will not be granted tenure and the chancellor will recommend that they be dismissed.
The teacher's union president, Michael Mulgrew, shrugged off the plans.
"There's less in the mayor's proposals than meets the eye," said the head of the United Federation of Teachers in a statement. "Right now a principal can deny tenure to a teacher for any reason. Most teachers would welcome an objective tenure-granting process based on agreed-upon standards."
Copyright 2009 Dow Jones & Company, Inc. All Rights Reserved
Monday, September 27, 2010
Community Activism is Not a Spectator Sport
In response to a comment filed under the previous post about a way to relieve the tax burden was for the board to make sure all at our district were taxpayers in our district...
If the district knows about the students then the student's school is likely paying us to bring the student here.If the school is not aware of the outer residency issue then it is up to you to notify the school. I know of one parent who called the school a few years ago about a parent who lived in another town and brought their children to Plainview where the grandmother lived every morning so the bus could pick up the children. The parent who complained ,called the school and they looked into it and informed the parent of the children that they would owe the school $$$ for their children in our school. The result was that the children are now in their own school district. Community activism is not a spectator sport as many believe.
If the district knows about the students then the student's school is likely paying us to bring the student here.If the school is not aware of the outer residency issue then it is up to you to notify the school. I know of one parent who called the school a few years ago about a parent who lived in another town and brought their children to Plainview where the grandmother lived every morning so the bus could pick up the children. The parent who complained ,called the school and they looked into it and informed the parent of the children that they would owe the school $$$ for their children in our school. The result was that the children are now in their own school district. Community activism is not a spectator sport as many believe.
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